A Weekend to Remember® Part 3: A Time to Recharge

This is the third and final post in our series about the FamilyLife® Weekend to Remember Alissa and I volunteered at the weekend before Thanksgiving. (If you missed the first two parts, you can catch them here and here.)

This organization is near and dear to our hearts. With the love of Jesus, they pour hope and life into marriages that need to be revitalized, renovated, and marriages that sometimes just need basic maintenance.

One particular couple who attended the conference really had our attention .

Before we met them Friday night, we were told of their difficult journey to the conference and about all of the various things that had gotten in their way to make this a weekend to remember, but for all the wrong reasons.

Because of their story, though, we had already covered them in prayer, and praised God because we KNEW that God had something in store for them this weekend.

I mean, if the devil is going to put everything out in order to try to keep you away, God's gotta have something for you on the other side of it, right?

On the way, they ran out of gas and got stuck on the side of the road. Someone brought them gas, but then their car battery died.

So after all of this...they still came. Albeit, late, but they showed up with smiles, grateful to even be there.

After the sessions that night, Alissa and I had the opportunity to meet them and talk with them a little bit, and sympathize with their story.

It being late, they were looking for an opportunity to find a restaurant that was still open. We gave our suggestion and drove back home.

Saturday morning, we spent our time greeting and opening doors, lending smiles, and trying to answer questions.

When they came in and that morning, they told me the their car battery died again when they went out for dinner, and a policeman from a local college helped them get their car started again so they could get back to the hotel.

Later that day, I ran into them again. They told me that, yet again, their car didn't start, and I offered to help them jump it this time and stay with it so it could charge for a while.

After way more effort into jump-starting a car than I have experienced before, it eventually started, and I sent them back inside to enjoy the upcoming session.

After what seemed like more than a reasonable amount of time, I decided it would be a good idea to turn their car off, then restart it, in order to see if their battery managed to hold a charge this time.

It didn't.

So I spent another while trying to get it to start again.

It didn't.

So I went inside, and told our dear friend and FamilyLife® missionary about the issues I was having with the car.

“So do you feel we need to buy them a new battery?”

YES!!! That's exactly what I wanted to do!

So money was collected!

I was going to go buy a battery, but then I came to the realization that tools were needed to remove the old one and install the new one.

I didn't have any of those either, so we rounded up a few hotel employees with willing hearts to try to find tools we could use.

One of the bellman told me he would meet me at the car with whatever he could find. At this point I was starting to get a little uneasy because I knew I couldn't go and get the old battery out, go buy a new battery, and get it in before the car owner came back out.

I mean, I just really wanted to hand back his keys and say “Hey, everyone chipped in because we love you, and we just hope the weekend can be redeemed a little bit.”

The bellman did make it down with the tools he could find... but none of them would work. So we got the car started, and the bellman wanted to turn it off, and then try to restart it again to see if it held the charge.

We tried.

It didn't.

Then the owner came back out, and I had to look at him and tell him the battery was dead, and wasn't holding the charge at all. I told him some of the different things that I had tried to do to insure that it would work, but of course...

It didn't.

So we said we would just get it jumped and drive to the auto parts store and get a battery together.

After struggling to get the car started AGAIN, the guy who was parked next to him came up and asked if everything was okay.

We gave him the very short version of the car not starting and it needing a new battery.

He walked back and came back with a meter, which showed the cables weren't providing much power to the car.

So he went back to his car and got his cables.

The car started within a few seconds this time!

Then we turned it off, to try to see if it would start again!

And... It didn't.

He walked back over to his car, looked over his shoulder and said, “I've got a battery in the back of my car.”

Not really believing I heard what I heard, I followed him, asking what he said.

He pulls the battery out of the back and looks it over.

“Will it fit?”

It did.

He walked over with socket wrenches, which he also had in the back of his car, and looked over at the man who owned it and said:

So I've got a testimony you need to listen to. I teach mechanics over at a community college.

The battery in my car died last Monday, and we were able to get it going again just fine. But God told me to put this battery in the back of my car before I leave in case something happens. And then, He said I needed to pack my cables and my tools, too.

He installed the battery, and it started. It was turned off, and then re-started just fine.

Before it was over, there were 7 of us in a circle holding hands and thanking God for His provision and for His leading.

God enabled me to work in what I truly believe is my calling and my gift, as a servant doing an act of kindness for someone in need.

God enabled our friends Keith, Dexter, Tiffany, my wife, and the bellman to be a part of this story.

God disabled my plans and my hopes for how God could get the glory.

He already had a plan in place!

God knew the troubles this man would face with his car. And because of that, another man had trouble with his. God used that in order to have him prepare for something and have something that His brother was going to be in need of.

God knows my heart and knew that I would jump at the chance to try to help.

He put Dexter and Tiffany there to walk in at the right moment in order to witness what God was going to do because they were coming to check on me and the situation with the car and tell me where my wife was.

My wife got to be witness the glory of God revealed when she walked back in at the tail end of the story and heard it rehashed from me and the owner of the troubled car.

I got to take the money that was gathered back inside, after the majority of people had left, and put in in the hands of a surprised Keith, who thought I had gone to get a battery for this couple to bless them.

The owner of the car told us that he was to start a new job on Monday , but for considerably less than this current position, and he added that his wife was worried about that and how things will go for them.

Alissa's response was perfect and God-willed.

“If God can take care of you like this, in this situation, I think He wants you to know that He will take care of you with your job.”

In my desire to be a blessing to someone, God multiplied the blessing He gave to me.

My friends, God is tangible.

God is real.

I prayed all weekend that people a room away would experience Him in an undeniable way, and that day, God did...

For them, and for me.

Sunday came. The last session ended with a large majority renewing their wedding vows. Each couple was given a beautiful document for them to sign as a visible image of their renewed covenant, with room for them to sign and for witnesses to sign at the bottom of a page.

Alissa and I were both incredibly honored, and humbled, to be asked to sign as witnesses for that couple with the car issues, and to pray over them again and their travels back home.

During that whole weekend, God was present.

We witnessed 24 salvations, 185 individuals asked to be filled with the Holy Spirit, and 99 recommitted their lives and families to Jesus.

And I feel, as volunteers, Alissa and I were impacted perhaps even more than some of those.

Throughout the weekend, we felt it heavily impressed upon us that God is doing a new thing...in us and through us. Seeking the Symphony (the new blog address) is part of that, but we feel there is so much more, and we cannot wait to share our journey with you.

Where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord.

Psalm 121:1b-2a

P.S. We are currently working on planning for the event for November 17-19 of next year. We are exhilarated to be part of this wonderful team and can't wait to bear witness to what God will accomplish.

If you would like to be a part of it, as an attendee OR volunteer, please comment or contact us.

Either way, you'll never be the same.

A Weekend to Remember® Part 2: The War Room

Once upon a time, we thought we knew about spiritual warfare. We thought we knew what it was to do real battle with the enemy, with the forces of darkness.

Then, we entered the War Room...and I don't mean a closet.

Please don't misunderstand me, I LOVE the War Room movie, and it is absolutely critical that we, as Christians, do battle against the enemy in our homes, in the private places...alone and removed.

But this was something else entirely.

Each Weekend to Remember® is bathed in prayer; did you know that? Months ahead of time the prayer team starts meeting to pray over those who will be in attendance, asking for God's will and protection.

As the time before the event gets shorter, the prayer team meets more, sometimes in person, sometimes via conference call. They start praying for individuals in attendance by name, asking for protection, provision, childcare arrangements, safety, softened hearts...you name it. 

Not only do we pray for the attendees and their families, we pray for the speakers, the hotel employees, and the people we'll all come into contact throughout the city. 

Bathed in prayer.

Even though we experienced prayer with the team leading up to the weekend, Josiah and I were a little nervous. We didn't really know what to expect, how things were going to work, or honestly, how the heck we were gonna pray for hours on end.

It was intimidating.

But we plunged in Friday night and began praying for couples as they arrived and got settled into the first two sessions. 

That night was great! We were inspired by some of the seasoned prayer warriors who dove into battle with conviction and authority. We learned. We prayed. We went home energized and looking forward to the next day.

But nothing would prepare us for it.

Saturday started much like Friday, but then, mid-morning, it was time to pray over the presentation of the gospel.

FamilyLife® knows what every marriage needs in order to really thrive is two people who love Jesus and follow His commands. Therefore, each marriage event includes a presentation of the gospel: the crucifixion, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, who was without sin, but died for the sin of the world.

Wives and husbands, daily, need to pick up their crosses and follow Jesus, to crucify selfish desires, and put on his cloak of righteousness that brings humility and hope. That's how marriages go beyond mere survival.

Sometimes, throughout the weekend, people on the volunteer team will be assigned to other duties or people will step out to stretch their legs, use the restroom, or just take a break.

But not during the gospel session. Everyone is in the prayer room during that session.

And it was one of the most powerful things we've ever experienced...an hour of our lives we'll never forget.

The whole room took turns powerfully and passionately interceding on behalf of every person in the ballroom. We declared scripture over lives, families, SOULS.

We fought...hard.

For our battle is not against flesh and blood,

but against the rulers,

against the authorities,

against the world powers of this darkness,

against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavens.

Ephesians 6:12

And let me tell you something: when you're in a spiritual battle, demanding that strongholds be broken, shackles removed, and walls come tumbling down, it is not without resistance.

There were times when we could feel the darkness pressing in trying to take hold of the moment, and distract us. But in those moments, the group would press in, shining ever brighter.

Even now, thinking about it, my hair stands on end.

Later in the day, another miracle would happen, a glorious answer to some of our prayers (but that's tomorrow's blog post).

We left on Saturday drained, having poured ourselves out in prayer. We went out to dinner, stealing just a little bit of time for ourselves to feed our own marriage.

But we noticed something very interesting at dinner: we were no longer part of this world.

I know I sound like a nut...hang with me.

Have you ever seen The Lord of the Rings? I'm a LotR/Hobbit fanatic, so immediately I recognized the scene we were faced with.

At the end of The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King, after the ring is destroyed, there's a scene back at the Green Dragon pub in Hobbiton. The four friends who have just returned home from battle sit in the pub, rowdy revelry all around, but there they sit...staring at one another. (There's a clip of it at the end of this post).

Everyone else continues on with life as it's always been, not even aware than a war has gone on, but those four comrades in arms are forever changed.

And that was our experience.

People laughed and talked around us. Servers flew around tables and busboys cleared dishes and prepared for the next guests. Families ate. Children played.

And there we sat, staring at one another: soldiers, weary from battle, but exhilarated by victory. And all around us people went on with life, completely oblivious to the fact that war was being waged.

I told Josiah I had never felt more not of this world than I did in those moments. It was tiring, but so worth it, and I remember almost being scared that life would go back to normal...that I would lose that feeling.

I was also sad.

I've loved Jesus for as long as I can remember and was baptized at 14. I've been a professing Christian my entire life...and now, at almost 38, I'm really feeling what it really means to be not of this world for the first time.

And it occurred to me that there are many, many Christians, particularly here in the western world, where religion is easy and God's word so readily accessible, who will go from cradle to grave never having really engaged in the battle.

My heart is so heavy.

Because let me tell you, having been in the battle does not make me a "better" Christian. It doesn't make me less sinful or selfish at heart, but it does draw me closer to God. So while I may not be a better Christian, I am a stronger Christian for having done battle with my brothers and sisters in Christ.

In all honesty, I can't wait until next year's event and the prayer times leading up to it. I look forward to doing battle with my brothers and sisters, powerfully proclaiming victory together, knowing the power comes not from us, but from the Creator of the universe, our Almighty God.

Until then, in the moments in between, I'll be here preparing for battle, engaging in some personal skirmishes, and keeping my armor in working order.

And if you ever need a sister warrior to go into battle with you, to wage war against the darkness, I'm here and I'm ready.

Pray at all times in the Spirit with every prayer and request,

and stay alert in this with all perseverance and intercession for all the saints.

Ephesians 6:18

P.S. If you are interested in attending a Weekend to Remember® OR you'd like to consider partnering with us to help strengthen marriages, please comment or contact us!!

A Weekend to Remember Part 1: It's Just the Beginning

A few months ago, I met a guy at a Food Lion. We talked a bit about where we might have known each other from, talked about what churches we went to and what we liked about them, and exchanged numbers. We may send each other a message about once a month, but I haven't really run into him since then.

I knew from the moment I met him it was a divine appointment.

The FamilyLife® Weekend to Remember began on Friday, November 18th, but before we reported for the prayer team, I had report to work. I went in at 5 am, having slept very little for the second night in a row, and under a little bit of stress.

I had been looking at our finances. It didn't look great.

I sent a text to my wife to discuss them. However, less than 5 minutes later I received a text from my aforementioned friend.

The message he sent said:

Unless the Lord Builds the house,

those who build it labor in vain.

Unless the Lord watches over the city,

the watchman stays awake in vain.

It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest,

eating the bread of anxious toil;

for He gives His beloved sleep.

Psalm 127:1-3

No other message, just scripture.

I thanked him, telling him I needed it, then I told him it made me ask 2 questions.

1. God, what house, what refuge are you trying to build or establish in my life right now? 

I have no doubt that this scripture was inspired by God, and I have no doubt that I needed it.

I know I'm not where God wants me occupationally, and I know that God has something in store for me and my best interests.

God IS supplying all of our needs, though maybe not all of our wants, and that's more than okay. It's fantastic!

But things are still tight enough for me to know and rest assured that HE is the one taking care of us.

And He is providing a push to make me want to go towards the promised land.

This leads me to my second question:

2. Where IS our "promised land"?

Uh.

I don't know yet. I know what my gifts are, and I know that God didn't give them to me for me to set them on a shelf and collect dust, so I'm certain those gifts are currently in refinement stages and my heart is being made malleable.

I know I shed tears of joy and sorrow that morning at the revealing of this Word in the moment, when I didn't even know I needed it.

With praise, I said,  “God thank you for hearing what I wasn't even saying.”

With sorrow, I said a prayer for God to open my eyes and to open my ears, and asked Him to open doors, and to give me to have the faith to walk through them.

In the sermon we heard last night, just over a week later (which Alissa wrote about here), the pastor said God uses the “hidden years” to develop in us the things we will need for the future.

David, after his anointing, was used for years in the same role...honing his skills as a shepherd. He was disciplined and knew he had a higher calling – one that was divinely inspired and God given.

He was being trained to be a gentle leader: to care about the, the helpless, the victims of prey, well before he walked in his purpose.

He faced lions and bears which ultimately gave him the skills to face Goliath.

Sometimes our position doesn't match our purpose, but God is using this in order to construct something new.

And sometimes in order to do something new, you have to deconstruct the old.

The things we practice in the dark shine even brighter in the light of day.

(Thank you for those nuggets, Pastor Cyon.)

I am not currently facing a giant, but I will still face a decision to act in faith when the time comes.


My original questions remain unanswered for now, and that's okay.

In His perfect timing, when He thinks I'm ready, He will let me know. If there's one thing I have learned over the last week, it's that nothing happens on accident.

Thus, our Weekend to Remember started before we even arrived on the premises. Alissa and I both felt like God was about to start something new in our lives...and then, we walked into the War Room.

More on that tomorrow....

An Apology and an Entreaty

There are times, in life, when you just don't know, when someone tells you something, but you're just not quite able to grasp the reality.

This weekend was one of those time...or the realization, at least. And man, do I owe you ALL an apology. 

Mea Culpa. Mea Maxima Culpa.

Earlier this year, when Josiah and I met with Keith Tully of FamilyLife about the church's marriage ministry, he was insistent that we should bring a group to the Weekend to Remember in Williamsburg this year (which just took place). 

We told him we'd love to take a group, but it just wasn't in our budget right now. That's why we do The Art of Marriage! It's way cheaper to put on at our local church. And The Art of Marriage is JUST like Weekend to Remember anyway, right? That's what I thought, anyway.

Keith persisted in his wish that we experience the event, and even offered to sponsor us. HUGE gift. Of course! we said. Why wouldn't we go if it was sponsored?

We started a group (CompassMarriage) and started advertising for the event. We posted on facebook about it many times and talked to some people in church. We invited...enough to say we invited.

Even when Keith sent us a message and challenged us to share just as dynamically about the Weekend to Remember as we do about our other business venture.

And I tried...I really did.

Here's the deal though: I can REALLY only share passionately about something like that if it's had a serious impact on me. There's a REASON I didn't really sell anything before now...no product had ever changed my life like it has

Well, that's no longer the case. I can now share PASSIONATELY about the Weekend to Remember because Josiah and I walked out of there transformed.

Generally, Josiah and I attend these events knowing we'll get tidbits and knowing we'll come out a little closer, but generally, our marriage is pretty good, so we don't expect anything mind-blowing.

Oh, how we belittle the power of our MIGHTY GOD.

Maybe it was the powerful anointing given to the speakers. Maybe it was the prayer that came from scores of people before and during the event. Maybe it was the relevance of the material. Maybe it was all those things.

All I know, is we are changed. Our marriage was already great...and now it's better.

But more than that, I can feel a peace deep within both of us and in our home. 

I think the largest change is in Josiah. I hope he doesn't mind me saying that.

He came out standing taller, ready to lead our family and our ministry. He came out equipped. And I am grateful.

He's already typed out pages upon pages of notes, revelations from the Holy Spirit throughout the weekend. Look for blogs from him coming soon.

So, my dear friends, I owe you an apology. I am so grieved that I didn't share MORE with you; that, like I have with my other business, I didn't message so many of you to invite you personally. I'm so sorry I didn't put exponentially more time and effort into sharing this experience with you so you could walk out changed with us.

By the grace of God, it isn't too late. 

There are at least two more in Virginia coming up. The first is in Virginia Beach on Valentine's Day weekend. What a great gift?! There's also one in Reston, VA in April.

You definitely want to GET AWAY for the event, so why not take a look at the FamilyLife calendar and see if there are any other locations and dates you'd love? (and be sure to use the group code "CompassMarrage" to get a discount!)

Let me illustrate how intensely powerful this event was for us: Josiah and I are considering forgoing the Le-Vel Lifestyle Getaway to Las Vegas (which we should qualify for), and instead, helping the local volunteer team in Virginia Beach that weekend. 

We haven't completely made up our minds, and a paid vacation together would be awfully nice, but we also feel so incredibly compelled to share the experience we had with others. 

It's a tough one.

I urge you. I am pleading. 

Do not let this valuable opportunity to enrich your life, your marriage, and your walk with God pass you by.

Could I be any clearer? 

Josiah and I are so grateful: to Keith Tully, the voluneteer/prayer teams, the presenters, FamilyLife, and most of all, God.

If you have any questions about this, please contact me. I don't often say things like that on my blog, but I would love to help you with this.

So now, dear reader, I end with a prayer for YOU:

Heavenly Father, 

There is no way for me to know who You will have read this, but I pray, if they are married (happily or ready to leave), engaged, or even thinking about marriage, that they will pursue this opportunity. I pray they will boldly take this step to fight against the powers that wish desperately to tear their relationships apart. I pray they will RISE UP and become people who FIGHT for their marriages and the marriages in their communities and all over the world. 

I pray these things with confidence, knowing You will answer my plea. 

I praise You God, for all that You have done, all that You will do, and all that You are. 

In Jesus' holy name I pray. 

AMEN.